The silly season is upon us again. First, Andy Panda, in Behavior Modification, and now, Brother Ass in The Phone Poem universe. Dialing it up. Well, given that I have scabs falling off all over the house, it is no wonder that I should be thinking of such matters. Now that I reflect on it, perhaps Behavior Modification might be just the place for this bit of nonsense too. I should have a special place for Silly Season items, but I have forgotten how to create that special place. I went there once, but the choice terrified me, so I backed carefully away. Categories! Ah well. Let's pull the spigot and see what tumbles out. Each bit of verse, of course, has a persona who may or may not be me, but who will frequently look a lot or a little like me, and who frequently will sound the same, a little or a lot.
Clarification: Brother Ass, I believe, was St. Francis' metaphor for his body. In any case it has always seemed to me an apt metaphor for the way in which my body behaves as well. In fact the first poem I ever had published was about that metaphor. The poem was entitled Balaam's Ass . Balaam was a prophet. You can find his story in Numbers 22-24. Balaam had an ass, a donkey who was considerably brighter than his master, and who could see things his master could not see.
My Body: Brother Ass
or
Brother Ass: My Body
I cannot tie a bow no more,
I cannot tie a knot;
I cannot zip a zipper--up,
And no, I'm not a tot!
I am instead a grandpa,
An old cantankerous man,
Whose body will betray him
Each and every way it can.
Thus, each day I rise and shine
In a bright miasmal fog;
I put one foot upon the floor,
And try to move the dog.
[footnote: usually Frollie; half the time Simon is in bed with us, though sometimes Frollie is too. Sorry for the interruption but in the Silly Season further clarification is sometimes a good thing, and sometimes, of course it isn't. Feel free to skip right along; just beware of beautiful, red-haired women in big blue convertibles. And smooth talking young men, of course. Did I mention that I was recently hit on the head?]
But the floor is cold and slippery,
And the rug is like a ski
That shoots off down the hallway.
Guess where that is leaving me!